SOML: Somebody that I Used to Know

Was there ever a time in your life when you first heard a song and felt that the song was written for you? That it might be your theme song for a certain moment or chapter in your life? Parang kiling me softly with his song lang ang peg. 

Somebody that I used to Know

Gotye feat. Kimbra

Now and then I think of when we were together
Like when you said you felt so happy you could die
Told myself that you were right for me
But felt so lonely in your company
But that was love and it's an ache I still remember

You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness
Like resignation to the end, always the end
So when we found that we could not make sense
Well you said that we would still be friends
But I'll admit that I was glad it was over

But you didn't have to cut me off
Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing
And I don't even need your love
But you treat me like a stranger and I feel so rough
No you didn't have to stoop so low
Have your friends collect your records and then change your number
I guess that I don't need that though
Now you're just somebody that I used to know

Now you're just somebody that I used to know
Now you're just somebody that I used to know

Now and then I think of all the times you screwed me over
Part of me believing it was always something that I'd done
But I don't wanna live that way
Reading into every word you say
You said that you could let it go
And I wouldn't catch you hung up on somebody that you used to know

But you didn't have to cut me off
Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing
And I don't even need your love
But you treat me like a stranger and I feel so rough
And you didn't have to stoop so low
Have your friends collect your records and then change your number
I guess that I don't need that though
Now you're just somebody that I used to know

***** ***** ***** ***** *****

We met in highschool. We were in the same club. He was a senior and was a junior. Somewhat the joker, the class clown that's what he was. And I think he still is.

I think he was my first love. I was happy when I was around him and I wanted to be with him always. 

He was also my first kiss. I think I joked him about not yet being kissed and how eager I was to experience it. I could still remember the first time his lips touched mine. It was at a friend's house. As I wake up from an all night drinking session, I opened my eyes and saw him staring at me. And as soon as he saw me awake, he greeted me with the sweetest and most magical kiss I could remember. Sabi nga nila, you don't forget your firsts.

He wasn't my first in bed though but he was the first one I confided to when I acted on my bi-curiosity. He understood me because, at that time he was feeling the same. So we explored it together.

I thought we were being discreet but years after we graduated, his batchmate confessed to me that our relationship was known in their group of friends. I think it kinda helped us that we were both respected in our batches, that's why no one dared to confront us.

As I have said he was a senior and I was a junior. He graduated and I was left behind. We exchanged text messages every now and then. And I would also call him at their home to ask for tips in out electronic class.

Months later things started to change. I seldom get a reply from him. And when I call, his brother would always say he's out somewhere. It wasn't a big deal then because I thought he might be busy. Then one day, when I texted him, the reply that I got said that he doesn't know the guy I was texting and that he just got the number from a friend. 

I sure could take a hint. He doesn't want me in his life anymore. He doesn't want to be connected to me in any way. At that time, friendster was still popular. He didn't want to accept me as his friend.

Years later, I accidentally saw in an office building in Ortigas. Apparently we both worked in the same call center but in different accounts. He was inside the elevator when I got in. As soon as our eyes met, I knew it was him. The elevator ascended for a couple of floors before I  got the courage to greet him. Still with people in the elevator, I turned to him and called out his name to get his attention. Instead of being excited and acknowledging it, he quickly shook his head and said something like 'he's not the person I was pertaining to." I felt so embarrassed. As soon as the elevator door opened, I got off even though it wasn't my floor. Still with my heart pounding with humiliation and anger, I called our common friend. He confirmed that my first love did work at that said building. I told him how I was humiliated by his friend. Days later another friend saw him at that building, but the difference was, he was acknowledged and they even got to talk.


I guess I just didn't expect him to act that way, like nothing happened between us. I thought after all that we shared we could still be friends or at least be civil. But I guess expected too much. Now he's just somebody that I used to know.










PS: He is now happily married and his wife is pregnant with their first child.
PPS: Belated Happy 1st Birthday pala sa blog na to. Salamat sa mga naglalaan ng oras magbasa ng mga munti kong sulat :)