I really don't know how to handle gay banters like the ones straight people do. Minsan pakiramdam ko pag di ako sumagot, lalabas naman akong guilty or affected at pag sumagot naman ako, lalabas namang umaamin na ko. Ang weird lang. Di ko alam kung ano ang tamang timpla ng comedy na di naman ako mabubuking. Pasensya na, dito ko na lang kinikuwento, kasi feeling ko friends naman tayo lahat dito e. Where was I? Ah, banters. Like tonight. Casually, I asked a classmate to open a tight bottle for me. Wala naman talaga kong ibig sabihin doon eh. I was just asking him a favor to open the bottle for me because I honestly can't. Then, he jokingly remarked, "Si girlfriend talaga oh." In my mind, I was like, 'what?! where did that come from.' Shux. For a moment, I was speechless. I didn't know what to say. (Pero syempre may kasama ng kilig yun. Si crush kasi yun e.) Ayus lang sana kung kami lang e, pede pa ko maglambing ng konti kaso ang masama doon ay narining pa nung isa naming classmate. Sumagot na lang ako na pagod na kasi ko kaya di ko na mabuksan yung bote. And she was really laughing. Tapos pabiro niyang tinanong: Sino sa inyo ang babae, sino lalake? Di ako makasagot. Make or break question. Napabulalas na lang ako na alternating kame, para di magkasawaan. Tapos humirit naman yung isa na ngayon daw siya ang lalaki kasi siya yung nagbukas ng bote ko. Ang weird lang kasi feeling ko I outed myself at that moment. Parang dapat ngumisi na lang ako at tumawa. Less talk, less mistakes ika nga. Kayo, paano ninyo ba hinaharap yung mga ganoong biruan?
feeling ko naman ang dating sa kanila eh pabiro lang din yung sinabi mo or more of a "sinakyan" mo lang ang joke nila.. at least di ka nasabihang pikon di ba :)
ReplyDeleteIf I were still in denial, I'd be very offended. Haha. Wala na rin kasi akong mga straight friends. Yung mga straight kong tropa, alam na bading ako.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteNasasakyan ko pa pag nagbibiruan kame ng bading badingan I mean o act like a gay kuno,,,,,BUT the hardest part eh yung tanungin ka frankly ng mga straight friend mo if you are a GAY or not, kasi di mo maiiwasan yan, of course magsisinungaling tayo pero yung part na bigla kang tanungin.
I'm gay
ReplyDeletei don't know what the essence of being a gay is ,
I still have to find out.
But I'm a man
and the essence of a man is standing up for yourself
and what you believe in.
When people ask me if im gay i just say yes ...
and then they complain how i look "straight" .
It's almost as if everyone in the world who ask guys if they're gay and when they say the word yes , they instantly expect a marching band will come out of nowhere , with some flying monkeys ,a parade of peacock and ostrich doing the tango and hear it later tonight on the news about the "BIG" confession on Ellen.
And don't forget the aftershock myth when
they know you're gay that you're supposed to ...
A. Know everything
B. Do what guys and girls and stereotypical gay guys do,
C. Always look good coz all the time you spent hiding in the fucking closet.
@Shenanigans: sana nga ganoon kasi i still want to be connected to them.
ReplyDelete@Mugen: Really, how do they treat you? nakakalimutan ba minsan nilang bading ka?
@Cute Desert Boy: yun yung nahihirapan akong sakyan, yung bading-badingan kasi I play the part so well. haha :P kasalanan ng masunurin kong hips eh. But yung straight close friends ko di pa naman ako kino-corner.
@Meowfie: Ganoon kasi noong kids pa tayo. sobrang big deal yung pag-amin. H2H talk sa amin noon yung coming out namin hahaha with matching iyakan at hugs.