Skip to main content

Ghost of boys-in-my-life past


Saw two guys from my past today. It was just so unexpected meet them in those places.

First was JM. As I was walking through the neighborhood streets, I saw a familiar figure walking towards my direction. I couldn't have been more certain that it was him. A sweet smile confirmed my guess. He just came from work and was just about to go home. Since it was the first time since we saw each other after so long, he decided to accompany me in my errands. While walking to different establishments, we were like our old selves again together - joking and teasing each other. It was just fun to see him again after both us became busy with our lives. And as we walked further, it was apparent that our relationship stayed the same after months of not speaking and seeing each other. It's as if nothing changed. And I was glad it was like that.  Then I realize, this is what I want. Maybe with him or not. Who knows. I just want to have somebody who can be my best bud in public and in the company of people but my sweetest lover when we're alone.

Next was D. As I alighted from an FX near a well-known mall in Ortigas, I saw a guy walk towards me. He had style, so my gazed followed as he walked pass me. And who to follow him was my first ex looking down as if hiding his face. I stared at him and waited for him to look at me and say "hi." When he did look, it was just the most weird and awkward moment. I greeted him and stopped for a while, awaiting a quick chit-chat. However, he just continued to walk faster and just nodded and waved his hand so awkwardly. At first, I thought it was funny because it seemed like that he was on a date and the sight of the exes talking wouldn't count as an awesome first date. But when I walked inside the mall, scene from the previous awkward encounter keeps on replaying in my head. I got annoyed and pissed off. I was like, "where the F*** did that come from?!" And there was a text message that he sent me hours later that got me all steamed up again. Then I realize, there was really a reason why we broke up, and this was it. Valid and reasonable. And most of the time, there's no use in reconciling with an ex because you can expect that what he was then will most likely be what he still is.

They say that in order to move on to another chapter in your life, you should not go over the previous chapters. But on the other hand, it's in reviewing the past that we discover the secret for our present lives. Yesterday's failure is today's success.

Comments

  1. Andami mo naman ex! Nakailan ka na kaya? Chos!

    Ano tinext nun ex mo sau?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Andami mo naman ex! Nakailan ka na kaya? Chos!

      tamaaaaah! lolz

      Delete
    2. @Mac: binura ko na sa inis. hehe

      @Ternie: Hoy. 2 pa lang :p

      Delete
  2. clap clap ako sa last statement. tamang tama. we paid a dear price for the pain of past and failed relationships so we must keep the lessons and experiences we got from it :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. buti na gets mo pa. binasa ko ulit, ang dami palang mali. hehe. mas maganda yung statement mo :)

      Delete
  3. People enter our lives to teach us a lesson...

    And so exes are born.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ok lang yung lesson e, yung hurt lang ang di maganda.

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Before Coming Out

Lately, I've been thinking of coming out. It's like I want to free of myself of the burden of keeping my identity a secret. But before I come out, I just have some personal conditions I need to accomplish first. I won't be doing these things just to earn people's approval on my lifestyle but more for me being comfortable in the path I've chosen to live.

What 2012 taught me..

Yesterday night, my friends and I went out for dinner. During our talk a friend suggested to share our year-end evaluations. Since I've already blogged about how my year went, I was quick to answer his question. His next topic was to complete the statement: 2012 taught me to.... I haven't really thought of the lessons or general theme of the closing year so I got to think about my answer. And here's what I shared. "2012 taught me to just keep on trying. Maybe I'll succeed, maybe I won't. No matter what the outcome may be, what's important is that I have tried that I have exerted effort to reach my dream. Even though I take things a day at a time, not really making long term plans, I still have goals for whatever opportunities and I would make every step to take advantage of that chance. I believe that it's better to have tried (in love, in career, and in life) than to regret not trying at all." So that's it. And with this, I end my 2012 ...

Limp

I'm feeling a little limp tonight - maybe it's the vagueness of my future or the dilemmas I am facing or the lack of financial stability I am experiencing - but all I can do is just speculate. I thought I have gone through this already, the quarter life crisis as they say - emotional lability, constant questioning of worth, and unexplainable emo-shit. I'm tired of this, tired to wake up each morning and feel unsure of everything. Ugh. I just want to shake this off. Anyway, speaking of shaking things, here's one topic I wanted to write about for so long. I first heard it from some friends [ang mag-react, guilty! hahaha] and it got me curious, though I have to say, I really don't need this. *ehem* What is it? It's penis enlargement. Yes, my dear friends, you read it right. PENIS ENLARGEMENT . The natural kind. They call it Jelq . They say Jelqing was derived from an Arabic word meaning 'milking', which is the main motion of this technique....