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How to Date?


While standing inside a junction-bound bus, I began to think about relationships, particularly dating. Is dating the same for everybody regardless of preference? Or, are there some differences and exemptions to the rule, if there are such rules? My main concern was 'how do PLU's date?'


I remember Angel Locsin in one of her interviews. The reporter asked her is she and Phil Younghusband were dating, to which she answered yes. A follow-up question was raised if they were dating exclusively. In essence, her answer was when she dates, she dates one person at a time. She doesn't entertain anyone else or any other suitor while dating a person.

Being inexperienced to dating and relationship matters, I wanted to adapt her principle. Date one at a time. Was that even possible? What if in the period of seeing someone - you occasionally go out and even send sweet text messages, a new person comes along and rouses your interest, do you entertain that person? Or flat out tell him that you're seeing someone at the moment? If I was to follow Angel's motto, I would turn him down and continue to see the first guy. But there was a book that I read that says otherwise.

The main message of one of the parts in the book was 'Don't date to mate.' It simply means that don't date with marriage or forever in mind. Date for the sake of dating. Date to know different people. And eventually, after meeting different people with different characteristics and personalities, you would know what you're looking for in a partner. You would have a type. The question was, how would you know what you want if you haven't seen everything and met everyone?

When it comes to dating and relationships, I think I'm all messed up. There was only one time when I dated and it was in a speed dating event. After talking to 11 girls for 5 minutes each, I got 3 matches (I chose them and they chose me - match!). Their numbers were sent to me but I didn't follow up for a second date to anyone of them. I just went for the experience and to find out if anyone would want to see me again.

So back to the present, I am kind of seeing someone right now. But there are others who, shall I say, are hovering. I don't know if I should entertain them all or just stick to the one I am seeing right now. Plus my ex has entered the picture. At present, I am not looking for a relationship. I am just having fun and enjoying every moment.

Now, I am all confused.

So how do you date?

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Comments

  1. CHRISTIANFebruary 3, 2012 at 8:51 AM

    passing by again :)


    --

    don't date to mate - date for the sake of dating.

    precisely!

    there are different kinds and types of dating.
    in my humble opinion, if it's just a friendly date, i think it's ok to be polygamous as long as the two of you understand that everything is to initially get to know each other.
    exclusivity comes after the both of you have finally came into a point that you wanted to know each other deeply.

    i think, dear, the situation isn't as confusing as it is. you're just making elses confusing.

    if i may quote you,
    At present, I am not looking for a relationship. I am just having fun and enjoying every moment.

    see? so basically you know exactly what you want. you just have to stick with it so that, inevitable as it may seems, you won't be able to hurt people who might hoping for your exclusivity.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. MamonFebruary 4, 2012 at 1:51 AM

      Christian, That's the thing I want to avoid, is to lead people on. Thanks for sharing your insight.

      Delete
    2. Victor SaudadFebruary 4, 2012 at 8:09 AM

      Same dilemma...
      so the followup question would be, How to avoid leading people on? How to say it best that "I'm not looking for anything serious" without seemingly shoving the person away?

      Delete
    3. MamonFebruary 4, 2012 at 2:59 PM

      Victor, tama. yung iba parang feeling kasi nila pinapaalis ko na sila.

      Delete
  2. kalansayFebruary 4, 2012 at 3:25 AM

    thanks for the visit. :)

    nice blog.
    and yes i love talking to strangers too. hehe

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. MamonFebruary 4, 2012 at 3:00 PM

      You're welcome.
      Thanks for dropping by as well. :D

      Delete
  3. AndréFebruary 5, 2012 at 3:56 AM

    That's a wise approach. I feel like it's wasted effort, time and money if I date around though. Haha. I'm a cheapskate.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Victor SaudadFebruary 14, 2012 at 6:47 AM

      Dating entails spending. We are on the same page on this. haha!

      Delete

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