Closet Clutters

In my earlier post, I have written moments in 2013 that one way or another made an impact in my life. Those moments shaped me and molded my thoughts in what I am and have today. Now, I want to list down some bits of learnings I have picked up and realized throughout the year. Since life on the other side (meaning, outside Mamon) has been all the same, these notes were derived and lifted from events with and of people from twitterlandia and the blogosphere. 1. There's no harm in hoping and seeing the good in people but you just have to prepare yourself for anything that might come; people aren't perfect. Disappointments and frustrations may occur. 2. Poison in friendship (read: lasunan) should and must be avoided at all cost. [unless, there's a clear agreement of terms and expectations.] 3. Being sweet in DM, PM & texts does not translate sweetness or even liking in real life. Even if something happens between the both of you, live or online, that still doesn'...

Ang bawat taon ay nag-iiwan sa atin ng mga alaala at mga aral na bago lang or marahil ay nalimutan na natin sa pagdaan ng panahon. Ang patapos na taon ay hindi naiiba. Bawat araw ay isang pagsubok ng ating pagkatao at paniniwala. Pamamaalam Hindi naging maganda ang bungad ng taon na ito sa akin dahil sa pamamaalam ng isang taong naging bahagi na ng aming pamilya. Nang sumakabilang-buhay ang aking amain nagbago ang lahat sa amin. Kinailangan kong maging matatag para sa aking ina para magabayan at suportahan siya habang siya ay nagdadalamhati. Hindi madali para sa isang anak na makita niyang nalulungkot ang taong inaasahan niyang magiging malakas para sa kanya. Pero sa awa ng Diyos at sa tulong na rin ng malalapit na kaibigan, unti-unti kaming nakabangon at nagpapatuloy ng aming buhay. Propesyon Noong nakaraang taon ay hindi ko masyadong nagamit ang propesyon ko dahil pinagtuunan ko ng pansin ang aking pag-aaral. Ngunit dahil na rin sa mga pangyayari sa pasok ng taon...

I remember my initial reaction - sincere happiness. I was happy for him, for having found that one special person he would love; someone he won't grow tired loving. And most especially, I was happy that he is happy. But later on, I can't help but feel sad, sad that he is someone else's love; sad that it wasn't me. But mostly because I felt sorry for myself believing that we can be together, that there can be us. This happened a long time ago. I had a crush on him the moment I saw his face. And I began to like him more as we get to spend more time with each other. He was good-looking, cool and very much masculine; traits that are a huge turn-on to me. I told myself that there is no way this guy would like someone like me. So I just settled to being his friend. That way, I can still be close to him. But there came a time when things went further than friendship, well, at least that's what I thought it did. Something happened between us. I was hesitant a...

I never really make a Christmas wishlist because I seldom get what I wish for. Plus, gift-giving is not really something that we do in the family. I always end up buying them for myself. But since I was tagged and this would be a nice reference to what I want to have, maybe not this Christmas, I'll just go along. :) Tagged by Victor .  The rules are:  1. Make a post entitled “All I Want For Christmas 2013” and use the photo above. 2. List 6 things that you want to receive as a gift. 3. Tag 3 friends who will make the same post (no tag backs). 4. Send me the link so I could check it too (optional). image from here 1. Navi Planner . Alright not to be a copycat. But this is really what I want most for next year. I began to love the Navi Planner ever since I won one from a blog contest last 2011. So I used it ever since. It's a great way to keep tabs on special dates and plans for the month or the year. And also, I use it as a diary of sorts of what happened...

I remember there were 7 or 8 of us boys in that room. It was an out-of-town trip organized by a school organization. The room had four double-decks; each of us having our own bed. On our last night of the week-long activities, we decided to join two of the double-decks and just sleep close to each other. Four on the upper beds and four of us on the beds below. Before we all went to sleep, we decided to have some drinks and just talk about each other's lives. Here was when the fun began. We learned a lot more about each other than before. And that made us much more comfortable with each other. The guy on my right was the first one to sleep. He seemed very tired from the day's activities. Then we all followed suit. In the middle of the night, I was awaken by some motion from the guy from my left side. My initial reaction was that he maybe masturbating. That got me curious and wide awake. As I observe in silence and closed eyes, that guy still shook his body and moved his...

Noon ay may isang bata Kargada'y kurba't mataba Ayaw niya noon ng pasukan Hilig lang niya'y halika't subuan Ngunit nang toro ay nasubukan Ito ri'y parang nagustuhan Nasubukan niyang pumasok pati mapasok siya ring nasubok Mapasukan unang naranasan kakaiba man ngunit nasarapan Nang siya nama'y inupuan sa giling at indayog, agad siyang nilabasan Ngunit dahil nga kargada'y mataba Marami ang nalulula Sa pagsubo sila'y umiiwas At mapasukan, sila ay pass Kaya ngayon ano ang gagawin ng bata kung ganyang walang nais sumubo at magpatira hahanap na lang ba siya ng power B o kaya'y balik na lang siya sa matamis na kiliti.

Minsan pakiramdam mong sobrang pamilyar mo na sa laro na tingin mo ay di ka na maiisahan o malalamangan. Pakiramdam mo na kahit bali-baliktarin man ang laro ay kaya mo itong ipanalo. Sabi mo sa sarili mo, dahili marami ka ng napagdaanan, wala ng makakapagpaikot sa'yo. Bagkos, ikaw pa ang magpapaikot sa kanila. Wala silang magagawa kapag ikaw na ang naglabas ng baraha. Ngunit darating ang araw kung saan makakakilala ka ng tao na mas magaling at mas bihasa kaysa sa iyo. Mas magaling siyang dumiskarte at mas marami siyang alas. At pag sinumulan na niya ang paglabas ng kanyang baraha ay wala ka ng magagawa. Ang pagkatalo mo ay sigurado na. Uuwi ka na lang luhaan at nasasaktan. At ang tanging baon mo sa iyong pag-uwi ay ang aral na kahit anong galing mo makipaglaro, makakilala ka rin ng katapat mo o higit pa ang husay sa iyo. Kaya kahit bihasa ka man, dapat handa ka rin matalo, masaktan, at umiyak. ***** Laro tayo! - Sige! - Ang laro ay Sweet-sweet-tan! Ang unang ma...

Napag-isip-isip ko lang noong isang araw na ang laki rin pala ng naitulong ng pag-blog at tweet sa buhay ko. Totoo. Noon, tulad ng nasabi ko na sa   Why I blog post ko, nagsimula ako mag-blog just to let out steam and share some personal and intimate stories. Sinimulan ko siya out of sheer boredom dahil nasa kabilang bahagi ako ng mundo, malayo sa aking mga kaibigan. Di nagtagal naging hobby na rin siya na mahirap alisin. Lalo pa akong nahumaling sa pag-blog nang nagsimula na ang pagdating ng followers na sinundan ng comments. Di ko naman naisip noon na magkaroon ng tagasubaybay dahil gusto ko lang naman talaga magsulat. Pero aminin ninyo, ang sarap lang magbukas ng blog tapos makikita mong tumataas yung stats mo lalo na kung may nag-iwan ng comment kahit "nice post" lang yung sinabi niya. Nakaka-good vibes lang kahit papaano. Nang nakisali na rin ako sa pagtalon ng ibang bloggers sa twitter lalo naman akong natuwa. Kasi kita mo na agad in real time kung ano nan...

I swore that I won't ever feel this feeling again. I guess I had it coming. Investing feelings in a friendship that I don't know if it's mutual. -- I recently met with a friend. We had a very nice chat after an event and we caught up with the lives of the people we both know. Then we went on with his recent conversation of a friend from a far off place. This friend of ours was, shall we say, elusive and mysterious. According to him, our friend was involved in an unfortunate incident which is why he was out of the radar for the past months. He continued by saying that our friend was still recovering from his injuries -and her's the kicker - here in the country, which kinda stunned me. All the while, I thought our dear friend went abroad. Well that's what he made me believe. The more my friend continued with his story, the more I felt betrayed. There I was being concerned with that friend, asking him how he was or how he's doing just to find out that he...

Sabi nila, kapag gumawa ka daw ng isang bagay, alam mo na dapat kung paano ito tatapusin. Noong mga nakaraang araw napaisip ako.. paano nga ba magwawakas ang blog na ito? Choices: Di ko na lang kaya gawan ng posts...hayan ko na lang amagin ang blog ito... delete ko na lang lahat ng mga sinulat ko.. Patayin ko na lang [kunyari] si Mamon...pero nagawa na yan e Gumawa na lang kaya ako ng tell-all entry tungkol sa mga nangyari at sa mga taong 'nayari' ko dahil sa blog [at twitter] na ito... no-holds-barred, name-dropping, with details pa... *smirk* Marami na rin akong naisulat dito. Karamihan ay mahahalay yung iba madrama at yung iba naman ay wala lang. Ito ay ilan lamang sa mga bumubuo ng bahagi ng buhay ko na tago sa ibang tao na kilala ko. Bakit ko nga ba naisip na isarado na ang blog na ito. Marahil dala na rin ng mga nangyari sa buhay ko sa mga nakaraang araw na masasabi kong overwhelming. Andyan ang buhay pamilya, karera, at pag-aaral na kailangan kong pag...

Conversation with a friend... Ayaw ko na nga ng fubu. gusto ko na ng relasyon. haays. haha drama E ang taas kaya ng standards mo.. pano kaya yun??? hahaha Ewan ko. basta. anjan ka pa naman e. kaw na yung malapit sa pagiging bf sa buhay ko hahaha *Thought* Mas mahirap kayang maghanap ng karelasyon kung kuntento at masaya ka na sa nakukuha mong atensyon at pagtingin sa mga kaibigan mo? Kasi inisip ko, sa ayaw mo man o hindi, maikukumpara mo ang relasyon mo sa malapit mong kaibigan sa taong tipo mo. Ewan ko. Naisip ko lang.

Kamakailan lang ay nadagdagan na naman ang bilang ng aking gulang. Hindi na mapagkakaila na tumatanda na talaga ako sa bente-syete. Masaya ko namang ipinagdiwang ang araw na ito sa pamamagitan ng pagsalubong sa aking kaarawan kasama ng malalapit na kaibigan. Tunay ngang naging masaya ang pagsalubong namin - kain sa buffet at inom ng mga banyagang alak na noon ko lang nakita. Simple ngunit may kurot pa rin. Ngunit sa aking pagsalubong, hindi ko naiwasang malungkot nang bahagya. Naisip ko, sa gulang kong ito, ano na ba ang narating ko? Nadadagdagan ako ng taon ngunit hindi naman nadagdagan ang mga nagagawa ko sa buhay. Parang ganoon pa rin, walang pagbabago. Nabulalas ko ito nang sandali sa aking kasama sa hotel room nang kinamusta niya ko. Ngunit sa alaalang iyon ang aking kaarawan, pinapaliban ko muna ang isipang iyon. Kailangan masaya ako, bulong ko sa sarili. Sinaglitan kong binisita ang facebook. Nagulat ako sa aking nakita; ang mga kamag-aral ko noong kolehiyo ay g...

Yan ang kadalasang tanong sa akin ng mga taong nakakasalamuha ko. Minsan wala lang para sa akin. Minsan kinakabahan ako dahil baka naghihinala na sila sa aking pagkatao. Minsan nama'y naiinis na ko sa pagtatanong nila nang paulit-ulit para bang nanghihimasok na sa buhay ko. Siyempre ang mga nagtatanong nito sa akin ay iyong mga taong iniisip pa rin nila ay straight ako - mga kamag-anak, mga kaibigang lalaki at babaeng, mga katrabaho, at mga kakilala sa simbahan. Sa dalas na natatanong yan sa akin, hindi ko na pinag-iisapan sila ng masama kung bakit biglang natanong nila 'yon. Kaya sa lahat ng nagtatanong sa akin, isa na lang ang sagot ko. "Career muna bago girlfriend." Straight man o hindi, valid naman din para sa akin iyong dahilan ko. Bakit? Una, ayaw ko munang pumasok sa isang relasyon nang hindi ako panatag kung pera ang pag-uusapan. Ayaw ko yung sa tuwing lalabas kayo, iisipin mo kung saan makakatipid o kung ano ang pedeng gawin sa limitadong bud...

I tried to declutter the room since I didn't do anything productive today. On the shelf, I found a piece of paper with something written at the back. It looked like some quotes my sister copied from her phone and wrote it down. Since the quotes were something you can advice others with, I was inspired to put it into graphics. Here are two of my favorites.

Sister went home this afternoon accompanied by a male coworker (MC). MC is tall, seemed fit and good-looking. I was inside the kitchen preparing lunch. When I peeked into the living room, I saw MC playing with the nephew. He seemed to be enjoying being with the kid and my nephew seemed be having fun as well. It was a good sight to see. Then, cue day dream... I see me and my partner (and maybe child) going home every Sundays to have lunch with my mother. My sister along with her husband and my nephew arriving with their own prepped food. We'll all be sitting around one big table having a great time with each other - our partners getting some beers, our children playing, and us having a meaningful conversation. It will be like in a scene from Brothers and Sisters or 7th Heaven. I know that dream would be impossible to happen. But I'm still optimistic.

"You did break up. But you guys are back together now. I won't dwell on what happened or ask why or who did what. I'm just curious. What was it that you felt or heard from someone, or saw that made you realize that getting back together was the best thing to do?" I forgot to ask that to my friend who after breaking up with his boyfriend is now back in each others arms. They seemed to be sincerely happy in their relationship. So i guess there's truth in the saying " love is sweeter the second time around. " But there's another school of thought in break-ups. And this is something I generally believe in. They say that you should never get back with your ex because there's a great chance that what caused your break-up is still there - may it be an attitude, a feeling, or an underlying issue, it's bound to be brought up eventually. So now I wonder, if there's such a thing as reconciliation, what could be the circumstances that ...

Sometimes storms come into our lives. And most of the time, they come without warning. You'd think that everything is fine, that the day would turn out to be sunshiny. But all of a sudden, there are big dark clouds covering the skies. It creates an overcast over your once pleasant and content lives. Then the storm hits. The storm brings heavy rains and stron winds. It destroys everything in its path. Nothing is spared. And since it came by surprise, nothing is saved. What else can one do after a disaster but to move on. Our lives should not stop after such incidents. Dreams should still be made come true. But moving on doesn't happen as fast as a storm can unleash its fury into our lives. Moving on takes time. We cannot tell someone to just move on and expect him to drop everything and go on with his life. We must acknowledge whatever he is feeling for feelings are always valid. Someone who just experienced loss can feel whatever he wants to feel, say whatever he wants ...

Walking with the crowd. Crossing the street. I see a lot of cute guys. One by one, I looked at them. Young professionals. Students. Regular employees. Then I wonder. From the hundreds of people I've met in my lifetime, how come I couldn't find Mr. Right For Me? Where is he? The questions just kept on going. Did he already come? Was I just too busy that I didn't notice him? Was I ready when he came? As we reached the other side of the street, the crowd slowly dispersed. Each going to their respective destinations. I was left walking still. Alone. Still with the questions in my mind. And playing what if's. What if...                I was already stable when they came into my life? What if...                I was ready to be in a relationship? What if...                 I have the resources to go on dates? What if...           ...

While watching the History channel this evening, I saw a preview of a show called America's Book of Secrets. As soon as I read and heard those words, I suddenly remembered something. I did once possess my very own Book of Secrets. Well, it was more like a Filler of Secrets but even so, it still contained all my secrets, dark secrets that I haven't told a single soul at that time. Before, I remember saying to a friend that I am the perfect person to share secrets to because I'm very forgetful. I would have forgotten a secret you have confided to me months after you've shared it. The forgetfulness prompted me to write all the secrets that I keep. Now looking back, having to write one's secrets in a thin, small book seemed to be a very bad idea. Now, I can't remember where I hid it. I can't even remember the things, all the promiscuity and curiousity, I wrote there. Should my relatives find my secrets I'm pretty sure all hell will break loose. 

"Thank you..." Parang iyon lang ang pinakaangkop na sabihin sa oras na iyon. Wala ng iba pang maaring ibahagi kung hindi ang pasasalamat. Sa kanilang pagsasama ay pawang kasiyahan lang ang nadama. "Thank you..." Sabay nilang nabanggit ang mga salitang iyon. Isang maiksing katahimikan bago mabulalas. Nagkatinginan, nagkangitian. Tugma ang damdamin, "Thank you..." Hindi man alam saan patutungo, o saan man makakarating. Hindi man sigurado sa mga ginagawa at nararamdaman. Ang pinakamahalaga marahil ay manatili ang pagsasamahan. "Thank you..."

Ewan ko. Sa aming magkakaibigan parang ako lang ata ang mas nag-enjoy sa highschool kesa sa college. Siguro dahil marami akong nagawa noong highschool, mas naging totoo ako noong highschool, mas active at mas sikat ako noong highschool, at higit sa lahat, sa highschool ko nakilala ang ilan sa pinakamalalapit at pinakapinapahalagahan kong kaibigan. Kaya eto ang ilan sa mga namiss ko noong highschool. GINPOM Hindi ako sigurado kung dahil uso yun noon or kung dahil yun lang ang alam namin inumin, pero sa  dalas naming nag-iinuman sa bahay ng tropa namin, di mawawala ang gin + any powedered drink. MINDORO SLING pic from tanduay Maliban sa Gin+fruit drink ay nahumalingan din namin ang Mindoro sling. Di na namin kelangan pang dumayo ng mindoro para matikman ito. Dito lang malapit sa amin ay mayroon kaming naging tambayan kung saan naging paborito namin ito, kapares ng kropek o sizzling hotdogs.  TAMBAY, YOSI, KAPE Bago pa man mauso ang ban ng yosihan sa mall...

"Given the chance to go back in time, would you try to change what you did or still do the same and take the risk?" "Siguro, I'll still do the same. Naging masaya naman... Yeah, I'll do the same." May gusto pa akong itanong sa kanya noong tanghaling iyon. Gusto kong itanong kung ang kasayahan na naranasan niya noon ay higit pa sa nararanasan niyang kalungkutan ngayon. Ngunit pinigilan ko na ang sarili ko. Ang nangingilid na luha sa kanyang mga mata ang tila sumagot sa katanungan ko. Dama ko ang katotohanan sa kanyang mga salita. Ngunit dama ko rin ang kulungkutang di na niya kailangan sabihin. Nang araw na iyun ay naging taenga at balikat ako sa isang taong nagmahal at nasaktan. Isang taong sinuko ang lahat para sa kanyang mahal. Nang walang kasiguraduhan. Ngunit nang wala ring alinlangan. Bagamat ganoon man ang nangyari ay naging matatag pa rin siya sa pagharap sa buhay. Nagdurugo man ang puso at nalulungkot sa bawat gabing lumipas, pinipilit pa r...

ang nakaraan... [Cuddle] [Cuddle 2] sa pagpapatuloy.... Iba yung pagnanais kong ilapat ang aking mga labi sa kanyang mga labi. Nanginginig at nakakapanabik. Pero umatras ako. Nahiya. Ayaw kong lumabis sa naaayon sa aming pagkakaibigan. Kaya yumuko na lang ako at isiniksik ang mukha sa kanyang katawan. Bitin , isip ko. Wala ng ibang pagkakataon pagkatapos nito. Kung di ngayon, baka pagsisihan kong pinalagpas ko ang pagkakataon. What's the worse thing that can happen? Baka iiwas lang niya ang mukha niya. Ayos lang, at least malinaw. O di kaya magkunyari siya bukas na di niya maalala. Pede naman din akong magpatay-malisya. Bahala na! Nang nakapagpasya na ko, dahan-dahan kong inangat ang ulo ko. Tinignan siyang mabuti. Marahan kong nilapit ang aking mukha sa kanya. Dama ko ang panginginig ng labi ko sa kaba. At sa wakas naglapat na aming mga labi. Ilang segundo rin yun nga awkwardness. Parang first time lang. Nakatikom ang aming mga bibig ngunit magkadikit. Binawi ko...

ang nakaraan .... sa pagpapatuloy ng kuwento... Hayun na nga tumabi na ko sa kanya. Sa ilalim ng iisang kumot, kami ay nagsiping. Hanggang maari ayoko haluan ng malisya kung ano man ang ginagawa namin o gagawin. Ayaw ko pa naman yung The Mistress o My Husband's Lover ang peg. Masyado akong affected sa mga ganyang istorya ng sulutan, ahasan, at salisihan kaya ayaw ko gawin sa iba yun. Pero sa isang banda, sabi ko nga, matagal na ko akong may gusto sa kanya. Humiga ako sa tabi niya nang hindi alam ang gagawin. Gusto ko siyang yakapin ng mahigpit tulad ng yakap niya sa akin kanina. Pero ayaw ko nga mauna, di ba. Kung siya ang magsisimula ay sigurado namang di ko siya pipigilan at di ako tatanggi noh. Nahiga ako sa tabi nang nakahilata. Umikot siya paharap sa akin at ako'y niyakap ng mahigpit. May panggigigil tulad ng kanina. Malamang sobrang tuwa ko. Sa tuwa ko, di ko mapigilan tigasan. Di ko na inintindi yung tigas. Basta masarap yung may nakayakap. Sa yakap niya, d...

Nakatayo siya sa labas ng building, nagyo-yosi. Ang tagal na noong huli naming pagkikita. Lumapit ako sa kanyang abot tenga ang ngiti. Na-miss ko talaga siya. Napakabait kasi niyang kaibigan sa akin. Pumasok kami ng building at sumakay ng elevator papunta sa room niya. Dalawa ang kama sa silid kaya natanong ko kung nasaan ang kanyang kasama. Umuwi muna sila sa kanila, sabi niya. Nag-alok ng pagkain na di naman binigay. Nahiga sa magkibilang kama. Nanood ng TV. Nagkwentuhan. Naging masaya ang takbo ng gabi. Naging masaya iyon dahil napakagaan niyang kakwentuhan at katsimisan. Tawanan lang kami ng tawanan na may kasamang kantyawan at asaran. Nabanggit niyang masakit raw ang kanyang likod gawa na rin ng maling pag-upo tuwing nag-aaral siya at nagko-computer. Bilang ako naman noon ay may kaunti ng alam sa katawan ng tao, binagbigay yan ko ang pabor niyang masahihin ko siya. Kaba at tuwa ang naramdaman ko nang mahawakan ko na ang likod niya. Sa isang banda, natutuwa ako dahil ma...

Even before fun runs and marathons became a hit in this generation, our school had already been organizing races annually. One night, being part of the boyscout family, we were tasked to become marshals for the annual fun run. We were asked to stay overnight at school to prepare all the things needed for the race - water in plastics, straw markers, route markers, stage and other things. If you're a regular reader of this blog, you'll have a good idea what went on during our overnight stay. So here it goes. After all materials have been prepared and tasks for the race were already delegated, it was time to hit the sack. However at that time, we were not equipped with sleeping bags nor tents. So we settled with sleeping on top of disassembled pingpong tables on top of a dirty, muddy floor. There were around 7 or 8 of us squeezing in on two adjacent tables. I was next to a higher classman near the edge. This upper classman is a jovial person. There's not a bad...

I remember a discussion in twitter about mom confronting her son as being gay. Most moms know it even before their sons tell them. Some even know that their sons are gay even before their sons know it. It's mothers' intuition. They say mothers are the first ones to know but last to confirm or confront their gay sons. My mom is apparently not one of those moms.I guess she's one of the naive ones - those who can't keep with the times, those who were born yesterday. How can I say this? Well there were a lot of times where I thought that my mom still believes that to be gay is to be cross-dressing, effeminate, or flamboyant. One time she asked me if one of my cousins is gay. I'm not one who tells on a sister. So I just returned with a question, probing why she thought so. She told me that her sister (my cousin's mother) suspects that her son is gay. I don't know, I answered her. Siguro malambot lang talaga siya , I added. And I guess she believes  me. An...

Have you ever experienced while walking by a restaurant, seeing its name or smelling their freshly cooked meals, you suddenly remember events that took place there? They say that our senses are closely associated with our memories and emotions due to their close proximity in our brains. It makes us call up powerful memories almost instantaneously with the aid of our senses. Since I tend to be a by-stander inside malls, I can't help but recall certain events in my life whenever I see these establishments: Friday's Burgoo  Trelli's KFC Bellini's Pepper Lunch Bon Chon Sizzling Pepper Steak Googel Aveneto Karate Kid Starbucks  Gong Cha Cha Time  Good or bad, memories are events that made a mark in our lives. It may hurt or calm us, crush or heal us. What's important is the lessons we've learned. Cherish the good ones and try to make good memories in place of the bad ones.

He stood there watching. Sobbing. Weak. Helpless. Little John, there in the corner, wishing that they would stop. The fighting. The shouting. Screaming. Cursing. Hitting. He couldn't take it. He just stood there watching. He never liked conflicts - the shouting and screaming. As much as possible, he stayed away from them. He kept distance. In his nook, his corner. The only thing he knows to do was cry. Now older, still little John dislikes conflicts especially coming from the family. How can something that's supposed to cradle love and affection possess so much anger and hostility, he thought. He wanted to run as far away as possible. He wanted to just disappear.

Minsan pag nagkakaroon ka ng SO (significant other) or SS (special someone) sa buhay mo, di ninyo maiwasang magkaroon ng tawagan or pet names. Classic example nun ay love, darling, mahal, pangga, beau, boo, bubba at kung ano-ano pa. So papatalo ba ko. hehe DK - naging DK kasi pareho naming nickname sa bahay ay nagsisimula sa D, so ibig sabihin niyan ay D** Ko. oh di ba, baduy. haha simula pa lang yan. Han - derived from my other name. When he first texted me, and addressesed me with this name, I thought he was just lazy typing. So I replied with the same name, and everything started from there. Mahal - Ito yung wala lang maisip na tawagan kaya nakiuso na lang sa mahal-mahal na tawagan. Soulmate - Ang dami kasi naming things in common kaya napagtanto naming soulmates kami. Though he's miles away, may pagkakaintindihan kami somehow. At excited ako makilala siya nang personal, like super personal. haha Big / little bear - Okay, siguro madali ng isipin kung sino si big bear...